test grid

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I don’t remember the first time I saw Halloween, and it doesn’t matter. Watching it as a kid wouldn’t be ...

Sometimes when I start a new project I get the "I'm the new Jan Brady" thing stuck in my head ...

So this only took a month to figure out. But I'm feeling pretty awesome about it. Now I want to ...

It's not often I get to say this, mostly because I spent the last two years working on Bent and ...

First, be born a human. Obviously, you’ve already done that—so good job. Now, make mistakes. Tons of them. Know this ...

So here's what happens the day your new book comes out: Not much. It's weird. It's one of the biggest ...

I saw a YouTube video once where a guy dressed head-to-toe like a red devil with a long tail and ...

Dear Javier, I once read an article about you where you said your favorite actor was Al Pacino. I assume ...

Dear Russell, You may or may not remember this, but we met a few months ago when you were here ...

7:00pm Me: How ya feelin' baby? Mauro: I feel like shit. Drink some juice. No, it sounds gross. Then drink ...

What's Up David, So my husband just asked me what I was doing and I told him I was writing ...

It started with Patty Hearst. Actually, it started when I was watching a documentary on Rolling Stone Magazine where they ...

So this morning I spent at least two hours lying in bed watching an unbelievably insane Twitter war explode between ...

Panic attacks are pretty special. Overwhelming surges of terror appearing out of nowhere, drowning you in fear, choking the breath ...

I thought of a lot of titles for the book before deciding on Bent: How Yoga Saved My Ass. This was ...

Yes, there is a part one to this post. I've written a lot of stuff. Not all of it publishable ...

I must have had some really weird dreams last night because when I woke up this morning, this is the ...

Since the weather's been getting warmer I've seen some very weird bugs flying around inside our house. And they're everywhere. It's ...

Saturday, 2:30 pm. There's a dude sitting outside my house in a white Mercedes. He doesn't appear to be homeless, broken ...

(...Or make it all better, depending how you look at it.) For Christmas my aunt Judi, knowing how stressed out ...

I just found a one question test that reveals whether or not you have the mind of a psychopath. It's ...

I used to make endless fun of my friend Jalee for owning a Kindle. Kindles were for the lazy. Seriously, ...

The following is the original version of the post that is now on elephant journal ← Dear Mr. Vice President-Elect Pence, ...

So my editor has been encouraging me to amp things up a little with third-party quotes, which do come in ...

There is an unusually large, very out-of-place house around the corner from us that Mauro and I refer to as ...

"Terrifying." This is my usual answer when anyone asks me how the writing is going. "It's terrifying." Writing a book ...

A little over a year ago a very nice woman named Debra found my blog and asked if I wanted ...

Because of the Olympics I just took a quiz called "How Many Of These Flags Of The World Can You ...

I get emails from something called Quora Digest. I have no idea why. I don't remember signing up for anything, ...

The week my editor first contacted me about writing a book was the same week Donald Trump announced he was ...

This is a running list of babble I've written that sounded super clever at the time, but I've since figured ...

I have become a recluse. Mauro has to do everything. He does the laundry, makes dinners, feeds the dog, walks ...

Once I had about 10 cents to my name. At least twice every hour, I think about Shamus McDog, who ...

I bet you've been there. I've been there. Many times. And I still didn't guess. I'd give you a hint, ...

Excuse me, but WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THE PERSON WHO WROTE THIS. Why do the people have to ...

I never thought I'd say this, but I think OJ may not be the killer. I spent like an hour ...

I was writing something just now about names you might find in a fable, like Jane or Henry, then I ...

My friend Solana and I watched Pretty in Pink. And we broke it down for ourselves. In pink. Andie dresses ...

Why am I so disturbed by this? The weirdest part has to be the gold ballet slipper caressing the face ...

Considering I'm married to an Australian, this has to be the best bad poem ever. And I've been Googling "bad ...

Um, OK, not sure at all what's going on with this guy. And for some reason I almost put a ...

I have no idea who wrote it. Or what the hell it means. I got it here. I like half ...

From Harold Pinter, British playwright, screenwriter, director and actor who was awarded the Nobel Prize for Literature in 2005: American Football (A ...

I keep a list of words and stuff that I want to fit into Bent somewhere. They're especially awesome when I ...

I'm still writing about catching on fire. It's been three days. So I looked up some beautiful quotes about fire ...

Another thing I started for cracked.com, along with 8 Reasons Your Childhood Was a Clusterf*ck of Dishonesty and Dude, I Wanna Hug Your ...

I was just looking for inspiration for a piece on Happiness I'm writing. I found this from Charles Bukowski. Damn ...

I'm updating my computer to something called "The Captain" or something like that because I desperately need Word to write ...

"Let's watch Purple Rain." That was Friday night. We were talking about Prince. But it was like midnight and Mauro ...

I don't get Instagram. Hashtags taunt me. I am so not cool enough for Instagram. Instagram is a gang of ...

I say it's... Actually, I won't say. I haven't look at the answer yet in an effort to draw out ...

I just woke up from a dream about my old cat Adonis. I dreamt I still had him but he ...

OK. Why does she appear to be paddling the guy with a meat cleaver? Why are they wearing masks? What ...

A man is taped to the ceiling. He looks like he has a very large chest. He doesn't look concerned ...

WHY. Why are there latex faces. And why is she wearing one. And why is it such a sad one ...

OK. Holding your junk is not going to protect you here. And what is that half shirt? And what is ...

"Compose a list of ten questions with answers about your book that you can discuss in an interview." This is part ...